Facebook is an interesting thing. It's such an official declaration of everything good and evil! You might be dating someone, but if you haven't updated your relationship status, don't even think about it counting. In the same way you can use it to tell everyone who you're with (and what you're doing), it's a very official deal-breaker, too. You can casually add someone as your friend and it's not big deal, you can't casually delete someone. It takes an extra bit of time and effort to seek someone out and make that decision. I don't know that it's that big a deal for me, personally, because I have "real-life" friends and while it's fun to share with them, I don't really base my quality of life on a make-believe world (no pun intended farmville, mafia wars, et. al).
For most people that know me, they know it is my intention and natural preference to be fun and light hearted, and not so much emotional or pessimistic. But there are some things that I just can't take! I can't take when people hurt my sisters feelings, my brother's feelings, my husband's feelings, my parents feelings and my kids'...well, they are like me and don't really take things to heart very much...but you get the point! I am indifferent about most things that have to do with me because in general, I love everybody and they don't mind me much, either - lol :)
This being said, I think I am old enough to have learned a lot of lessons about people, but I still continue to give people the trust that they are truthful, kind, caring and good. It's hard for me to learn that this just isn't so. I can't generalize everybody and I'm starting to see that there are just no general rules for how to look at the people around you.
Lots of people will tell you you matter, lots of people will tell you they care but in the end, lots of people just want to do what is easiest and most convenient for them, regardless of who is around them and the alternatives that can be chosen. Lots of people are just looking out for themselves, and carelessly rippling the waters of those in their path.
I would be remiss if I didn't admit that I look out for me, too. But I don't know any great person who could selfishly smother the friendship and the kindness of the people in their lives. Who could manipulate the results of so many relationships who they have no business meddling in because of pure selfishness. How can one (my) family display so much compassion, care and concern unconditionally and then be treated so rude and poorly in return? I am flabbergasted and utterly appalled.
Directly and indirectly displaying this ridiculous amount of faux friendship and then trampling selfishly on anyone in their way. I wish people like this never entered our lives, but then I guess there would be no lessons in the "easy way." I'm just having to learn that when one sadistic teenage girl has to have her way, the walls of servitude can come crumbling down on top anyone she chooses. I guess it's a lot easier to have your way with people than it was "back in the day."
SO...my newest lesson is learning how to just let people and situations go. And let everything around them go, too. Even if it seems impossible. In the end, those who know you know the goodess in your heart, and those who don't, don't matter. And it matters very litte what you can say about it. It's best to just cut out that section, let your "friend" number drop a few on facebook, and when a poorly manipulated person or two decide to let themselves out of your life, count your blessings that there won't be any nosey people bothering themselves with your personal information anymore.
I would never treat people this way. (But I would blog about it because we all know when I can't let it go, it's best to just write it out!)
So that's it. It might seem a little harsh, but God knows, I LOVE my family more than anything in this world - more than myself. And when they're not protected, when they're blindsided, and even when things roll off of them, (and even when they don't,) I feel a different kind of fire when they're treated wrong.
Tanya
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